mikeShriver

I am going to accomplish things, today.

I’m going to read, I’m going to write. I am going to call my grandmother, change my oil, and finish up those nagging around-the-apartment tasks that stare at me like failure whenever I walk through my home. I am going to refinish the dining room table. I am going to take the hinges off my refrigerator, then put them back on so the door swings the other way.

I am going to fix not only the things that are broken in my apartment, but the things that are broken in my body. I am going to shave, cut my hair, and clean out the gung under my nails. I am going to get that weird pain in my joints checked out. I am going to go to the dentist and get my teeth cleaned: now, again in six months, and then once every six months until they fall out of my head.

I am god of getting shit done.

The world is a grab-bag of unfinished errands. I will reach into into its oily maw, and it will regurgitate to me the pregnant abstract of potential accomplishment, ready to be brought into the concrete through the confident and unwavering work of my own hands. They are the points on a compass, the notes of the scale, the coaches book of plays: the ‘to’ begging that I ‘do.’

My list is long; my tasks, towering and ominous, but I am ready. I have the will and the strength. There is nothing in my future that I can not overcome, even if it has started to snow.

It doesn’t really matter that I’ve lost my telephone charger, and my car doesn’t start when it freezes. I don’t have a belt sander, and I haven’t purchased stain, yet. My wrenches are all metric. My fingers are swollen from the last time I pinched them between the fridge and the cabinet. I’m pretty sure that won’t be too much of an obstacle.

Yes, I am quite confident that nothing can prevent me from writing that half-researched column, even with that all-day marathon of M*A*S*H on television. I’ll just watch one episode.

It sure looks cold outside, right now.

The cold aggravates my joints, but I’m sure I can brave it outside and the bus and make it to my dentist appointment. I hope I have enough bus tickets.

Indeed, today is going to be a day of catching up. I will finish off those things I have been putting off for so long. Once I am caught up, I will feel an overwhelming sense of accomplishment. It will have all been worth it. I can just imagine the looks of awe in the faces of my friends when they see the how good my apartment looks. They will stand in awe at my spry, youthful movements. I can proceed with my life in health and contentment. Once all is finished, I can look back at the day with pride and a glass of wine, and say “I have done it. I have done it all!”

Yes, I am going to do that. I am going to do all of this. I am going to do more than this!

Ah… but first I am going to have to get up.

Tags: accomplishment, Creative Writing, todo.

The morning after the apocalypse happened, Kane LaRue discovered, to his dismay, that he could no longer survive the world. Kane’s means for survival relied almost entirely on services and goods that others provided. Now that there were very few others, most of whom were solely occupied with their own survival, Kane found his prospects severely limited. With the restaurants, grocers, coffee shops, bars and Nordstroms all closed or destroyed, Kane found he had to rely on hunting, foraging and growing his own food. He had to build his own shelter, and sew his own clothing.

Nearly two thirds of The Republic of Cascadia’s 35 million citizens failed The Institute’s Apocalypse Skills Assessment/Survivability Skills And Readiness program. Urban and suburban residents, those people who are most likely to be affected by a civilization-ending event, are three times more likely than those in rural areas to lack this important training. 98% of those polled in our nation’s capitol city of Vancouver have stated their estimated level of rural self-sufficiency ranges from low to none. Many polled stated they would simply make use of one of the city’s ‘Suicide Booths’ instead of attempting survival in a world without Starbucks.

The Institute of Cascadia’s ASA/SSAR provides basic skills needed for survival in environments when self-sufficiency is required. Participation in the program is highly recommended by the Ministry of Security. The program provides a strong foundation of skills that will separate you from your reliance on the infrastructure of society. Skills taught include personal food production, preservation and preparation; shelter construction; sewing; brewing and distilling of spirits; personal defense; and a wide variety of other important abilities. Competence in the program has been shown to increase participants’ willingness to attempt survival in the end-times, and with completion of the program, participants are eligible for government sponsorships in the advanced-level programs The Institute provides.

Kane’s story did not end well. Without the proper training, Kane struggled with his everyday life. He was reduced to inexpertly trapping small animals and foraging for berries and other small edibles. His remaining existence was short and unpleasant. Kane’s apocalypse was caused by the breakup of the now long-defunct United States. His predicament is no less relevant now than it was back then, and with the Great Plains Alliance recent development of nuclear arms, and the increasing instability of the region’s geography, there is no more urgent a time to prepare your family.

The Institute’s program has compiled the most likely post-apocalyptic end-of-life scenarios, and has prepared survival training to meet each one of these possibilities. Give your family the preparedness they need for these unthinkable scenarios. Implement ASA/SSAR in your household, and engage your children in a lifestyle of competence and personal experience. Contact the Institute of Cascadia today for information on enrolling in this important program

Tags: apocalypse, cascadia, Creative Writing.

Step One: Preparing Your Workspace

A clean brewery is critical to the success of brewing your first beer. Infection is your enemy, and sanitization is your primary weapon against against the incoming invasion. Before you even begin to brew, ensure that your equipment is clean and sterile, and that your workspace is well-organized and easily accessible.

Starches are extracted from grains and converted into sugars, which are then flavored with hops, consumed by live yeast and turned into alcohol. That’s the theoretical concept behind the production of beer. In practice, the act of making beer is so laced with craft, tradition and style, that such a simplistic explanation does it no real justice. The first time I attempted to make a batch of my own beer, I was introduced to a surprising world of craft that I had not previously known existed.

Step Two: The Mash

Malted grains, usually barley, form the bulk of the fermentable sugars in a batch of beer. In order to extract these sugars, the grains must be ‘mashed’ with hot water. The heat of the water allows enzymes to form which break down the starches into fermentable and non-fermentable sugars. The temperature of the water during the mash is extremely important to the success of the brew.

Being a first time brewer, The complexity of making an all-grain batch of beer was well beyond my skill level. The introductory-level alternative is called an ‘extract’ batch, In that process, this prohibitively complicated first step is replaced with the purchase of a pre-made malt extract. This is seven pounds of a thick, sticky syrup that contains the sugars that are necessary for brewing.

Step Three: The Boil

The liquid that results from the mashing process is called ‘wort’. This liquid contains all the sugars and other compounds required for fermentation, but it is not quite ready for the yeast to be pitched. Before that can happen, the wort needs to be brought to a rolling boil, and kept there for at least an hour. Boiling performs multiple functions, including sanitizing the wort, and removing unwanted compounds that can add off-flavors to the final brew. During the boil, hops are added to flavor and bitter the brew. Boiling also helps extract alpha acids, which preserve and bitter the beer, and other flavors from the hops.

I tend to be an inattentive person, which is problematic during this phase of brewing. Attention is key, if neglected, the wort will burn or boil-over, and the caked on, burnt sugars are messy and difficult to clean off of the stove-top. Close attention must also be paid to the addition of hops. Hops are added at various times during the boil, in various quantities depending on the style and recipe being used. If the schedule isn’t followed closely, the resulting beer may be too bitter or too sweet, or it may lack depth of aroma and flavor.

Step Four: Cooling the Wort and Pitching the Yeast

Once boiling is complete, and the wort is ready for the yeast to be pitched. The final step is reducing the temperature of the wort to a range that the yeast can survive, usually below 70 degrees. The faster the wort is cooled, the less chances there are for bacterial infection. Once the wort is cooled to the proper temperature, it should be aerated, usually with vigorous shaking of the fermentor. Then the yeast can be pitched and the fermentation chamber sealed.

Preparation is extremely important to the process of brewing, but I still find myself caught off guard almost every time I get to this step. The simplest way to cool without any special equipment is to douse the brew-pot in a sink full of ice-water. Lack of preparation forces me to rush to the 7-11 next door in the last few minutes of the boil to grab three bags of ice to fill my sink. I can say from experience, that haste amplifies the destructive force of my mess.

Step Five: Fermentation

Fermentation should happen at a constant temperature that is determined by the yeast and style being brewed. Ales are fermented by top-feeding yeast which produce the best beverages at 60-70 degrees, whereas lagers are fermented by bottom-feeding yeasts at 50-60 degrees, for a longer period of time. Fermentation can be done in two stages, with the first usually consuming most of the sugar, and the second stage happening in a different fermentation vessel for clarifying and finishing the beer. A second stage of fermentation is not usually necessary for most styles.

Human beings have always been captivated by fermentation, from the first people to discover an overturned beehive filled with rainwater and natural mead, to the monks of Europe that crafted the divine styles to support their monasteries. What perfect force other than the breath of God can turn simple earthly sugars into the holy spirits of the angels?

Step Six: Bottling

Once the beer has completed fermentation, and reached it’s final gravity, it is time to package and condition. At this stage, it will lack any carbonation, and there are several ways to package and carbonate beer. Bottle-conditioning involved mixing a small amount of adjunct sugar into the beer, and sealing it into bottles. The residual yeast left in the beer will consume the small amount of added sugar, creating carbon dioxide, which will remain trapped in the beer due to the sealed bottles. The beer can also be siphoned off into a keg, which can be pressurized with a CO2 tank, and served directly from a tap. Homebrew stores sell 5-gallon ‘Cornelius’ Kegs specifically for this purpose.

My first attempt at brewing left me exhausted, and my kitchen covered in the ruin of a smelly mess. The resulting beverage was cloudy, yeasty, and under-carbonated. But the holy miracle had nonetheless taken place. Water had been transformed to beer, and I was irreversibly addicted to my newest hobby.

Tags: Creative Writing, Homebrewing.

“Where are you coming from,” The agent checked her passport again, “Dong-Yeon?”

“San Francisco.”

The agent glanced over his glasses at her, “You live in San Francisco?”

Dong-Yeon took a moment to think over the question. American order agents had a very particular way of communicating. They asked specific questions, but never seemed to want specific answers. “No, I live in Seattle. I was visiting family in Seoul.”

“Ok, So you are coming from Seoul.” again, he peered over his glasses, “Were you raised in Seoul?”

“No. I grew up in South Gyeonsang Province.” She paused for a moment, the agent silently continued to examine her travel documentation, so she continued, “I grew up on Namhae Island. It’s a long bus from Seoul, about 7 hours. The village I’m from is small. I did not even go to the mainland until I was seven years old.”

Dong-Yeon Oh doesn’t fully understand why she is telling all of this to the border agent. He is still silently poring over her documents, and she is not quite sure he is listening to anything that she has been telling him. She finds the silence nerve-wracking, and does her best to displace it with whatever idle conversation she thinks he might find relevant. The last time she went through a customs check, the agent asked her all about her uncle in Seoul. She did not think her uncle in Seoul was very relevant to her entry into the United States, but it was the only thing that came immediately to mind.

“We went to visit my uncle.” The security guard glanced up at her quizzically, which made her hesitate for a moment. “To Seoul, when I was a child, My grandmother took me on the bus to Seoul to visit my uncle that lived in the city. That was how I first got to see the mainland.”

The border agent was now entering information into his computer terminal. He made a short muffled grunting noise. Dong-Yeon could not tell whether it was directed at her or the machine.

“He had a,” here she struggled for a word, “A bell. On his door. I had never seen that before. There was no such thing in my village in Namhae. It was just like the houses that were on television. I played with the bell all afternoon, until my grandmother–”

The agent cut her off, “OK, What was your business in Seoul?”

The abruptness of the question threw Dong-Yeon off her guard. She had been a nurse in Seoul may years before, but she did not think that this was what he meant by the question.

Impatiently, it seemed to her, he reframed the question, “Where you traveling to Korea for business or personal reasons?”

“Oh,” she understood now, “Personal reasons. I used to work there. I thought maybe you were asking me about that.”

“Do you go to school in Seattle, or are you employed, here?”

“I used to take classes at the community college, for ESL. But now I work at a hospital. I am a nurse.” From her perspective border agents do not have their priorities straight. The questions they ask have no real importance. She could tell the agent many important things if he only asked the important questions.

Dong-Yeon stared at the agent for a moment. He had asked about her job in Seattle, but did not ask about the people she knew. It was the people that were important. She could be telling him all about her family, her grandmother, and her uncle in Seoul. She could talk about the people she has met in Seattle, since moving here. Without them she would not have the life she now enjoys. If he had asked, she would have told him about her classmates in the ESL program: Mizuki and Quan, who she explored museum openings with. She could tell him about the time Jia-Jia slipped and fell on the wet stone in front of the Sheraton while walking downtown in the rain. Dong-Yeon stayed with her in the lobby of the hotel until the rain stopped.

Karen, her host mother during those three quarters, had first suggested she try to find a permanent job in the US. Without that, who knows where she might have ended up. Where might she be without the friends she made at the public library’s “Talk Time” sessions, or what about her roommate that spent so much energy convincing her to attend the sessions in the first place? Each person had a small and important role in making this city like a second home to her, but the agent did not seem concerned with any of this; He did not even seem to recognize that this city could be her home.

The agent’s stamp fell heavily against her visa, and brought her out of her contemplation. He looked at her over his glasses again as he handed back her papers.

“Welcome to the States, Dong-Yeon. Enjoy your visit.”

Tags: Creative Writing.